cover letter

May 13, 2011

When asked what I study in college, I tell people that I’m a creative writing major. When asked what I’m going to do with my degree, I tell people that I want to go into prison education. The general response is one of shock; people are usually left speechless, unsure how to respond to something so out of the “ordinary.” I became active in prison education in the fall semester of 2010 at ASU when I participated in the ENG 484 internship, the PEN Project. When the opportunity to teach at the prison in Florence presented itself, it was obvious to me that I had to jump at it. What better chance could there be to learn whether this is the profession I want to specialize in?

In the beginning, I was very excited about being selected to participate in this internship. Despite having little teaching experience and not being terribly knowledgeable about Shakespeare besides what I had learned in high school, I was grateful for the opportunity and immediate began buying books and references on Shakespeare and his work. When the semester started and out departure to the Florence State Prison was continually put off, I focused on our reading, particularly Conover’s “Newjack.” The story of the year Conover spent as a corrections officer in the New York penitentiary Sing Sing instilled a sense of fear in me that clouded my enthusiasm about the internship.

• Week 1: She said that she was nervous before the semester started, but that as weeks passed where we couldn't go to the prison to teach, she began to grow frustrated and the nervousness left. I was the exact opposite. I was so excited at first, but as I waited those weeks for entry, and as I read Conover' s "Newjack," I began to fear my class without even knowing who or what to expect.

Although I assured everyone that I was not afraid that I would be working with inmates, I was at heart terrified that I would be a terrible teacher and unable to get through to my students. This fear made me dread every looming Friday until our eventual departure.

There were a lot of concerns I was faced with that I did not know would be an issue beforehand. One in particular was the issue of dress and how I ought to present myself while at the prison.

• Week 1: I spent the morning worrying about what to wear, concerned that my choice should be modest, yet temperature appropriate. I was astonished at how difficult it was to fit all those criteria. The simple act of putting on clothes, from having a wide variety of apparel at my disposal was a great concern to me later in the day. Our students have one color to choose from, and a few lengths and sizes to fit all body types. What do they do in the hot weather; how do they cool down? And is their clothing warm enough on mornings such as these, when my toes are numb with cold?

Surprisingly, the issue of clothing did not becoming easier with time. It made me hyper aware of my situation as a female in an all-male prison. As we attended classes, I had to wonder if by simply being women, Gabby, the Rachels and I were the only motivation for some of the students to attend our classes. Or was it the fact that for every day they spent in class, the students got two-for-one days off their sentence? Especially given our subject – Shakespeare – it was hard to believe that all the students were there simply because of the chance to learn.

I did not know what to expect or what to hope for from this internship. Who would I be teaching, and could I live with not knowing why they were in prison? I would have to accept them for who they were and what they did, despite not knowing any of the particulars. It reminded me of my reading of Richard Shelton’s Crossing the Yard last semester, and his philosophy that he would treat all his students as if they were born yesterday, and that their past actions had nothing to do with the class. I did my best to adopt the same feelings, and I feel that over time, as I became more acquainted with my students, it became easier to do.

What I noticed, over time, was that our students were not much different than my brothers or people I knew in high school. Some of the jokes they told or things they did when they were nervous or bored in class were no different from things my brothers or friends have done before. I was reminded, more than ever before, that these students are really just regular people. Sometimes, from movies and shows, we expect them to be socially awkward or extremely rough, but the students Gabby and I dealt with did not fit any of those stereotypes.

One of the more memorable moments this semester:

• Week 8: At one point during the middle of our class, I noticed a large group of students (who I assumed were ASU students, given that many had ASU t-shirts on) walking through the yard with Deputy Warden Jackson. I was both shocked at the sight of the students (since I'd never seen a group quite that large on the yard) as well as appalled. I wanted to ask our students how they felt about people walking through the prison to see how the inmates live, and if they felt as if they were being looked at as animals - because that is how I would feel if I were one of the inmates. I didn't ask the question, however, because as soon as Steveo saw the group he ran over to the windows and started to act like a trapped ape. A couple of the students looked over in shock, but the rest seemed to ignore him. The students, Gabby and I couldn't help but break up in laughter, only because of the absurdity of the situation and Steveo's behavior.
  The way Steveo acted has had me thinking all week about how people expect inmates to behave. While Gabby and I have had fun telling this story over and over to friends around us, it was strange for me to see Steveo act like a caged animal. To him it may have been fun and games, but by doing what he did, did he reaffirm in those students' minds that day that inmates are animals, subhuman, the way that most society seems to view them? When in fact from my point of view, he is just like the boys I knew in high school, getting worked up and having fun scaring people? My view from the inside is very different from what it may have been before this internship; had I seen something like that on my first day, it very well would have terrified me, given that I wouldn't know the inmate and assume he was angry, rather than being funny.

This is a perfect example of a time where our students were acting like anybody else, but could be perceived as being something other than normal. It has made me more aware of what we think inmates are, versus who they actually are; most people, I feel, don’t even give them a chance.

There were two particular aspects of the semester that were aggravating and I had to learn to deal with over time. The one I discuss the most throughout this portfolio was the issue of assigning homework to the students and their lack of motivation to complete the homework assigned. One of the many examples of my irritation is explained below.

• Week 6: Assigning homework has become an issue, made specifically apparent by the results of this week. Despite the fact that I thought we were being clear, those who did homework for the most part misunderstood what was expected, and those who have done homework in the past failed to do their homework for this week - due to other classes. In the real world, that wouldn't fly, we would face consequences - and yet in this setting, given our situation, I feel like I have no other choice but to shrug it off.

Another frustration we had to deal with was in the case when Gabby could not attend a class due to religious reasons. Although she and I were willing to make up for the class at a different time, given our situation, we were not allowed to do so, although she and I desperately didn’t want to have to miss another class before the end of semester performance.

• Week 6: As Joe's email to Gabby and I stated, we cannot work outside of the period we have agreed to meet our students - this restriction is so very costly and frustrating, since we are both willing to make up for the lost time in some way. It is sad that in this way we are just as equally confined as our own students by a seemingly unforgiving system.

Despite all the obstacles we faced this semester, I feel like I have learned so much and have benefitted from the program more so that my students were probably able to. Not only have I been challenged to teach a subject I am not very knowledgeable in, but I have been able to interact with students who desperately need the reassurance that education can be worthwhile. I have been reminded time and time again how inmates are still human and appreciate services just like anybody else. The sincere thank you’s the students gave us when we gave them their own copy of Merchant of Venice and their good-byes after the last day of class will always remind me of how vital programs like this one are.

• Week 9: The prison administration, both in Florence and Phoenix, is enthusiastic and completely welcoming now. They have asked how many interns can we send? It will be too few for them, as deputy wardens in other units are now asking for ASU programming. We will add 1-2 more classes but will not expand English 584 too far. That risks bringing interns who may not be fully suitable, something that would harm rather than help this program. In the meantime, we have agreed to schedule ASU faculty speakers on an occasional basis. A couple English faculty already have agreed to go to Florence to give readings and talks.
  

This comment and the experience that I have been given will always stay with me. To know that I have been a part of a program that has been so accepted and requested by the Department of Corrections to return is very rewarding. I hope that this program with continue for the sake of the students, as well as other inmates who have yet to have the chance to take part in the program.